A friend of mine posted something last week about how she is enjoying being a Mom for the first time because she stopped trying to be the Mom she’s not made to be. She wrote, she has accepted her house is “clean enough and she has accepted that because her special talent is spontaneity with her kids. She can plan the best trips for the best price and make some amazing memories with her family”. I am paraphrasing of course. Thank you, Josie, for being open and honest.
This really struck a chord and inspired me to accept who I am as a Mom, not who I think I should be, or who I am pressured to be by society or family or who I think everyone will like the most…
There is so much pressure on Moms.period.
So much pressure to work, to stay at home, to be present, to have their own jobs and income. To be apart of PTA, to be at every sports event, class party and field trip. To have a clean house, to have it decorated to the nine at all times, to have the best kids toys and gadgets. To have the nicest cars. To cook 5-star meals every night, and lunches packed. To never forget laundry in the washer/dryer (for days. eek), To document everything with pictures and scrapbooks, To have 2.5 kids and a golden retriever, To be crafty, To Travel and expose the kids to the world, To save for college, To discipline…I could go on and on, right? These are just a few pressures that I feel daily. It is a lot! To say motherhood is easy is a lie. It is one of the hardest jobs that I have ever done, but cliché or not, it is so rewarding. I am beyond blessed to have the title of Mom. I know this. So many people who have/are/or will struggle for that title. That is not my debate right now.
My hope for you is to realize and A-C-C-E-P-T who you are as a Mom. You don’t have to be everything! You don’t have to be there for every activity (I promise you if you aren’t there or show up late your child is going to be totally fine). Throw the pressures from society, work, and family out the window. Figure out who you were M-A-D-E to be and live to the fullest. I hope this platform empowers women and mothers to feel comfortable with who they are. No judging here. No shaming here. Nothing but support and lifting one another up!
Now confession time for me, talking about accepting myself as a Mom
I LOVE cooking (on most days, like a lot of you we are constantly on the go for after school activities). It has been a passion of mine since I was little. I remember cooking with both of my grandmas and my dad. Growing Up, my mom worked for a local hospital for 35+ years. Her hours were from 4-3:00 so she should be there to get us off the bus. My dad owned his own business so he was home with us some of the time too. But my Mom never missed a class party or field trip…but the lady could not cook(I love you Mom!) so I learned to cook for my brothers and me, if my Dad was out of town, I was making dinners before Basketball, Baseball games/practice.
Maybe it’s nostalgia why I like to cook.
Now I give you this advice but it really means it is for me too. I want you to know that I feel guilty for sharing my family’s meals. I don’t want any Mom to ever feel pressure to make what I make or do the lunches that I make. That is not why I do it. I am here to be a resource for you. I am here to help you think of some new ideas that maybe you didn’t think of before. Yes, clean-ish and healthy is important to me which is why I spend so much time doing it. So this message is for me too. I make dinner, most nights. But of Fridays, you better believe we are eating at some Mexican Food restaurant. My house isn’t always the cleanest…I have to thank Roomba robot vacuum for the majority of it. I have a sink full of dishes on most days. Basically, you do you and own it. Be happy with YOU! Be the Mother that you were made to be. You are your kid’s perfect Mom.
Be the Mom you were made to be!